Thu, 8 April 2010
Success. What is it? How does each of us define it in our lives? It’s a question that has hovered over many of the stories we’ve told in the last three years. Aimee Brown has been many things in her life – a snowboarder, a hydrologist, a pastry chef, a goat farmer and a writer. Always a writer. Being a wordsmith and making a living as one are two different things. Last year, Aimee got the opportunity of a lifetime a job writing for National Geographic. Excited, she packed her Subaru, threw in her cowboy boots and moved east from her beloved Oregon towards an incredible career. After a few weeks of living in D.C. a nagging feeling set in. Were days looking out an office window, lonely treadmill runs and sun salutations without the sun success? Could you ever define it as such? It took six thousand miles of driving for her to answer that question.
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Dear Aimee, I just listened to your radio story at the suggestion of my friend, Robyn Paulekas, who told me she knows you. Your tale is eerie in its familiarity to me. I'm totally convinced that we are some kind of kindred spirits. I, too, spent my late teens/early 20s backcountry skiing and climbing in the West (Wyoming for me) before moving to Washington, DC, to work at National Geographic. I, too, rode my bike to work, went to climbing gyms, stared at photos of mountains every night before going to bed. Did you, by any chance, keep a sprig of sage brush on hand to sniff when you got kicked by homesickness? I, too, saw a presentation in the NG auditorium that finalized my decision to quit and move back West. I, too, wondered if I'd regret turning down such a sweet job to be a dirtbag, lived in my car once I returned to Wyoming, and have never had an inkling of regret about coming home. Thank you so much for your telling and poignant story. I'm just about to finish graduate school in nonfiction writing at U of Wyoming, and in this somewhat unsettled time I'm downloading your story so I can listen to it to remind myself about why I'm here and what I'm trying to do in the world. Give me a call if you ever pass through Wyoming and need a place to crash. A kindred spirit, Emilene
Want some cheese with that whine. Jeez, she comes to one of the great outdoor cities in the world and climbs at gyms? I listened to this podcast while driving to paddle on world-class whitewater (two miles outside the DC Beltway), driving past some of the country\'s best top rope climbing areas at Carderock and Mather Gorge, and my drive paralleled a 240-mile canal towpath (hiking and biking.)
She got homesick and panicked, blowing a great opportunity. Stuff happens. Why do people insist on dressing this stuff up in tired, sophomoric, platitudes about east vs. west, city vs. country, I\'m pure vs. you\'re not.
She got homesick and panicked, blowing a great opportunity. Stuff happens. Why do people insist on dressing this stuff up in tired, sophomoric, platitudes about east vs. west, city vs. country, I\'m pure vs. you\'re not.
Thanks everyone for the great comments. I've loved the conversation that has come out of this episode both here and on facebook. It obviously hits a chord with a lot of people. This is why I tell and help others tell this kind of outside story, because there is a worthy conversation to be had on these topics.
You know bill...I see your point. But this story is as much about where you are from as it is about where you currently are. For better or for worse we all go through the grass is greener struggle. It's interesting. I have a few friends who reside in North Conway -- a lot of them are really incredible climbers, some of whom are making a go at in a professional level. A lot of those people thought they would be better served being out west closer to bigger peaks, but their sense of home pulled them back east away from those perceived opportunities. We could have easily told the same story from that perspective. Some of my first outdoor experiences were actually in D.C. as well. My mom ran one of those museums and I liked it there. Loved the museums. I remember trips to the Shenandoah and I also remember thinking about how big those peaks were in my mind. How much they inspired me. You do have wonderful country.
Becs and I almost moved to Blacksburg a few years back, but for better or for worse our hearts are here in the west. We know that...we came to accept that in our careers. No opportunity outweighed our connection to our very personal idea of what home is. That personal idea is just that -- personal. A preference for the place where we came of age. I think that's what Aimee point is. When a landscape helps raise us, helps creates you it can be terribly difficult to leave it.
You know bill...I see your point. But this story is as much about where you are from as it is about where you currently are. For better or for worse we all go through the grass is greener struggle. It's interesting. I have a few friends who reside in North Conway -- a lot of them are really incredible climbers, some of whom are making a go at in a professional level. A lot of those people thought they would be better served being out west closer to bigger peaks, but their sense of home pulled them back east away from those perceived opportunities. We could have easily told the same story from that perspective. Some of my first outdoor experiences were actually in D.C. as well. My mom ran one of those museums and I liked it there. Loved the museums. I remember trips to the Shenandoah and I also remember thinking about how big those peaks were in my mind. How much they inspired me. You do have wonderful country.
Becs and I almost moved to Blacksburg a few years back, but for better or for worse our hearts are here in the west. We know that...we came to accept that in our careers. No opportunity outweighed our connection to our very personal idea of what home is. That personal idea is just that -- personal. A preference for the place where we came of age. I think that's what Aimee point is. When a landscape helps raise us, helps creates you it can be terribly difficult to leave it.
Bill does make a good point - the DC area is beautiful and has numerous opportunities for recreation.
But there just aren\'t any \"mountains\" in DC.
I was born and raised in Utah and grew up climbing and skiing the Wasatch. Upon finishing my undergraduate degree, I took a highly competitive internship in DC which shortly turned into a full-time job. It was my dream job. I flew back to UT, packed my car, and drove east.
Long story short, I lived in DC for two years. I worked long hours at my \"dream job,\" traveled all over the world on the taxpayer\'s dime, and started graduate school at Georgetown. I was \"successful.\" I had a job that thousands of other intelligent and driven people (mostly Ivy League-rs) wanted. I was also absolutely miserable.
I took up kayaking on the Potomac. I top-roped and soloed every conceivable route at Great Falls. I cajoled many a friend and intern into weekend climbing trips to Seneca Rocks, 4 hours away. Still, i dreamed of real mountains - Rainier, Hood, Shasta, Whitney, Lone Peak, the Tetons, and others dominated my daydreams.
I just wasn\'t happy. I wasn\'t homesick; I was empty. After two years, i packed my car and drove west. I\'m living at the foot of the Wasatch, working on my graduate degree, and enjoying my mountains. Last week, I took two days off work and school to enjoy 50\" of fresh snow.
It\'s not that I get out in the mountains every day; I don\'t. It\'s that whenever i do, they\'re right at my doorstep.
But there just aren\'t any \"mountains\" in DC.
I was born and raised in Utah and grew up climbing and skiing the Wasatch. Upon finishing my undergraduate degree, I took a highly competitive internship in DC which shortly turned into a full-time job. It was my dream job. I flew back to UT, packed my car, and drove east.
Long story short, I lived in DC for two years. I worked long hours at my \"dream job,\" traveled all over the world on the taxpayer\'s dime, and started graduate school at Georgetown. I was \"successful.\" I had a job that thousands of other intelligent and driven people (mostly Ivy League-rs) wanted. I was also absolutely miserable.
I took up kayaking on the Potomac. I top-roped and soloed every conceivable route at Great Falls. I cajoled many a friend and intern into weekend climbing trips to Seneca Rocks, 4 hours away. Still, i dreamed of real mountains - Rainier, Hood, Shasta, Whitney, Lone Peak, the Tetons, and others dominated my daydreams.
I just wasn\'t happy. I wasn\'t homesick; I was empty. After two years, i packed my car and drove west. I\'m living at the foot of the Wasatch, working on my graduate degree, and enjoying my mountains. Last week, I took two days off work and school to enjoy 50\" of fresh snow.
It\'s not that I get out in the mountains every day; I don\'t. It\'s that whenever i do, they\'re right at my doorstep.
I haven\'t been able to get to bed at a reasonable hour because I keep researching where I\'m moving for six months- near Inyo National Forest and Yosemite. Listening to your story was great for me tonight because it reaffirms to me my strong routes in Vermont and New England will always be there. No matter how much I know I\'ll love the West and what there is to see and do- I\'ll do it and still miss home. And home is where I\'ll end up. In my lil\' Green Mountains. But instead of skiing 50\" of fresh, we\'ve seen the driest trails in April for some time, and I\'ve been out biking my heart out before I\'m at an elevation that will make me gasp and mountains that will feel HUGEEEE to me.
So here\'s to quitting my cozy full-time year round job at a bike/tele ski shop for summer and here\'s to a job with the Forest Service for six months selling tourist noobs permits!
Great story! Thanks!
So here\'s to quitting my cozy full-time year round job at a bike/tele ski shop for summer and here\'s to a job with the Forest Service for six months selling tourist noobs permits!
Great story! Thanks!
Just wanted to say thanks, Aimee and Fitz. This story was exactly what I needed to hear this week. It's good to have a living, breathing reminder that there's nothing wrong or immature or myopic about sacrificing some amount of professional success for something you love just as much.
Wow. Thank you.
Emilene: It’s great to hear from you, and congratulations on being close to finishing your grad work. It does sound like we’re walking parallel paths. Next time I’m through that way I’ll try and give a holler.
Maura: Good luck with your decision. An editor I work with repeatedly tells me that the right decision should be the one that lights a fire in your belly.
JPW: Good luck with your move. The PNW is a great place. I hope you find it welcoming and inspiring.
Bill: Thank you for your comment. You’re right, DC has some amazing opportunities, beautiful spots, and great people. When it comes down to it, however, it’s not my spot.
You’re also right that I got hit by homesickness, but it wasn’t homesickness that drove my decision. It was the feeling of emptiness that Taylor so beautifully described. When it came down to either living empty, or throwing the dice and believing that there are, and will be, other opportunities, it wasn’t all that tough of a decision.
It’s important to me to love where I live, to wake up inspired, and ready to rock and roll. The west does that for me. It sounds like DC does that for you.
Taylor: Nice work carving time out of your program to get some turns in. The Wasatch are amazing, and it was an epic storm.
Silvia: I hope the summer is fantastic. I spent eight days backpacking in the Greens before crossing over to the Whites and the Presidentials. Stunning. Absolutely.
Evie: There really isn’t. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
Everyone, thank you again. The response has been great.
The day I got out of the car, I laced up my shoes and went out for a run. The trail was a sloppy, soak-your-shoes and splash icy slush from your calves to your ass sort of mess. I don’t think I’ve stopped grinning since. Here’s to getting out there.
Emilene: It’s great to hear from you, and congratulations on being close to finishing your grad work. It does sound like we’re walking parallel paths. Next time I’m through that way I’ll try and give a holler.
Maura: Good luck with your decision. An editor I work with repeatedly tells me that the right decision should be the one that lights a fire in your belly.
JPW: Good luck with your move. The PNW is a great place. I hope you find it welcoming and inspiring.
Bill: Thank you for your comment. You’re right, DC has some amazing opportunities, beautiful spots, and great people. When it comes down to it, however, it’s not my spot.
You’re also right that I got hit by homesickness, but it wasn’t homesickness that drove my decision. It was the feeling of emptiness that Taylor so beautifully described. When it came down to either living empty, or throwing the dice and believing that there are, and will be, other opportunities, it wasn’t all that tough of a decision.
It’s important to me to love where I live, to wake up inspired, and ready to rock and roll. The west does that for me. It sounds like DC does that for you.
Taylor: Nice work carving time out of your program to get some turns in. The Wasatch are amazing, and it was an epic storm.
Silvia: I hope the summer is fantastic. I spent eight days backpacking in the Greens before crossing over to the Whites and the Presidentials. Stunning. Absolutely.
Evie: There really isn’t. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
Everyone, thank you again. The response has been great.
The day I got out of the car, I laced up my shoes and went out for a run. The trail was a sloppy, soak-your-shoes and splash icy slush from your calves to your ass sort of mess. I don’t think I’ve stopped grinning since. Here’s to getting out there.
I mostly agree with Bill. This Aimee Brown character supposedly strives for an adventurous life, yet she can\'t even live out a year in a city as a journalist for National Geographic! Cmon girl... life is all about new experiences, or u can go back to Mt Hood and run the lift until you die.
Sure there are more mountains out West, but sometimes you have to sacrifice what you want at the time for what you want in the long run. The mountains are not going anywhere...
Stay home, because we don\'t need your kind in our fiery tribe of nomadic pupils.
Sure there are more mountains out West, but sometimes you have to sacrifice what you want at the time for what you want in the long run. The mountains are not going anywhere...
Stay home, because we don\'t need your kind in our fiery tribe of nomadic pupils.
Nico, I don't see why Aimee should not be consider part of our culture.
Why should she adhere to your definition of success? And whats not fiery about going against a common sense decision to stay in good job?
Look I'm in agreement. Sacrifice and thinking long term are good things. Trying new things does push us to grow. It's huge. But when it comes to passion, there is no compromise. I bet you are passionate about something, maybe it's a job in D.C. or a city. Maybe you believe in your work (like I do) and I bet you know exactly why you make sacrifices. You do it because one passion probably outweighs your other passions. That's like falling in love. Not something you can control. Listening to those passions are what cause people to change the world, take an incredible job fostering change, return to a deep connection with nature and start things like the Dirtbag Diaries.
Other than doing things that hurt others, your family or yourself, I'm never going to tell someone how to live their life. Figuring out my own is a challenging adventure that keeps me guessing.
Why should she adhere to your definition of success? And whats not fiery about going against a common sense decision to stay in good job?
Look I'm in agreement. Sacrifice and thinking long term are good things. Trying new things does push us to grow. It's huge. But when it comes to passion, there is no compromise. I bet you are passionate about something, maybe it's a job in D.C. or a city. Maybe you believe in your work (like I do) and I bet you know exactly why you make sacrifices. You do it because one passion probably outweighs your other passions. That's like falling in love. Not something you can control. Listening to those passions are what cause people to change the world, take an incredible job fostering change, return to a deep connection with nature and start things like the Dirtbag Diaries.
Other than doing things that hurt others, your family or yourself, I'm never going to tell someone how to live their life. Figuring out my own is a challenging adventure that keeps me guessing.
Aimee,
Remember the days sitting around the ODE office and talking about the future? Imagine my delight when I came across this entry on the Diaries (via The Cleanest Line). Fantastic piece Fitz... and glad to hear your tale Ms. Aimee- The cliché approach of \"the journey is the destination\" certainly has some truth to it.
Aimee, I\'ve lost your email but would love to hear more about what your up to- Drop me a line at mark@atlasfoto.com if you have a second. I\'m in Valencia, Spain at the moment wrapping up an international MBA and trying to figure out where life goes from here-
All the best-
Remember the days sitting around the ODE office and talking about the future? Imagine my delight when I came across this entry on the Diaries (via The Cleanest Line). Fantastic piece Fitz... and glad to hear your tale Ms. Aimee- The cliché approach of \"the journey is the destination\" certainly has some truth to it.
Aimee, I\'ve lost your email but would love to hear more about what your up to- Drop me a line at mark@atlasfoto.com if you have a second. I\'m in Valencia, Spain at the moment wrapping up an international MBA and trying to figure out where life goes from here-
All the best-
I see Bill's point about rec opportunities around DC, but it's ridiculous hyperbole to call Carder Rock or the VA side of Great Falls "some of the best top rope areas of the country." Sure it's a cool set-up with the river and whatnot, but for someone who grew up a half an hour from Smith Rock (as would be the case with Aimee), those "crags" might be more depressing than not climbing at all ;)
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I was deeply affected by this story - not because of a yearning to be near mountains or the outdoors - I just felt it highlighted the need to follow what each of us really want to do with our lives, regardless of what anyone else might think. Thank you kindly Aimee and Fitz.
A Dirtbag fan from New Zealand
A Dirtbag fan from New Zealand
Aimee...will you marry me?
No but seriously, I know that feeling you felt when you watched that short ski video. A friend of mine made a short ski video about Telluride (http://vimeo.com/7875517 check it out), the place I just moved from to start school in Denver. I'm a 33 year old college freshman and just watching that video makes me want to be a 33 year old college drop out.
No but seriously, I know that feeling you felt when you watched that short ski video. A friend of mine made a short ski video about Telluride (http://vimeo.com/7875517 check it out), the place I just moved from to start school in Denver. I'm a 33 year old college freshman and just watching that video makes me want to be a 33 year old college drop out.
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